Bounce!

Hey so whats new in Month 7? Well my hair has some bounce to it y'all. Its not heavy or weighed down at all but I guess its reached the length where it just bounces now. I am soooooo excited about this. Because even when my hair was shoulder length it wasn't very bouncy at all. When I shake my head it just flows from side to side and and and when I SLIGHTLY TILT MY HEAD BACK MY HAIR SITS ON MY SHOULDER!! yep that's right it has been so long since I have had hair touch my shoulder. Also I have given up on the battle against build-up. No matter what I do its just not going away so how did I reach a happy medium? Mascara LOL I took my brush to my locks and painted away. I will wash my hair tonight or tomorrow which should wash the mascara out of my hair but hopefully the build-up will still be stained black. cross your fingers *X* But if not I'll whip it out again :-) That's all for now

Have a Happy Halloween
Oh and the funniest thing I've seen for any Halloween was from my classmates today they dressed up as Snow White and the Seven dwarfs. Needless the say the guy was snow white I wish I took a picture it was great.

Okie Dokie here is the outcome

Then I styled it...

I absolutely love my locks!

YAY they finally arrived!!

Well I got my loc loops today yay! I have been retightening my lock for the past week its really not so easy when I have to fit it in between studying and classes. Anyway I have retightened my entire front but not the back. I decided to trythe loc loop anyway bcase I want to wash my hair so I figured why not. I set it up and can't wait to see how it comes out tomorrow morning. Also here is a seven month pic

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There is beauty in the Broken

Broken, Shattered, Crumbling, Destroyed

Reach for your inner beauty, There is something beautiful almost majestic about those who struggle.

Have you ever looked deep into the eyes of the wounded

There in the midst of desperation and hopelessness there is a sparkle of hope, trace of happiness even if its just the one happy memory of days long gone

there in the midst of devastation is a trace of God

and for some reason no matter how unthinkable or how unbearable

you know better days are coming

there's beauty in the broken

Redemption~Learning to Love myself...

Redemtion~Learning to love myself.

What was my redemption? I've been liberated from bondage of the views and expectations of others.

Just being own my own and far away from home has sparked a lot of self reflection in. I’ve really been evaluating myself and previous friendships and previous relationships and the reasons why they worked and they didn’t and it surprised me to realized how thin the line between the two were. The biggest difference was my perception of myself at the specific time. I’m sure like many of you I’ve been in relationships were I just felt I needed to stress or even prove my feelings to the other party and I never realized it then because truly I just thought that’s who I was. I care about people a lot and I like to show them that but now I realize that maybe I was trying to prove it to myself. I was trying so hard for their approval, love and affection that I lost myself in the midst of it all. So now I’m beginning to realize more who I am in God, as a person, as a woman and as a partner. Its so funny how life’s experiences are all lined up to clarify future life’s questions. First step to learning how to love is truly learning what things make me happy. Second step is doing those things until the joy in my spirit just burst and spills over into my reality. Surprisingly even in the midst of some of my loneliest hours I am so happy. I feel blessed, I feel so loved by those who matter and as far away as I am from my Mother and Sister I feel closer to them than ever before. I guess what I needed all along was separation from the negativity that unknowingly was draining me. This chapter in my life seems to be one of discovery, challenges, peaks and plateaus, fulfillment, and most of all Growth. I wonder whats around tomorrows corner?
Until next time,

Be blessed and self-sufficient Know that you are wonderfully and beautifully made. Know that even in your darkest hour God is there to be a comforter, a friend, a lover, a partner, or just a silent listener. And if it’s your darkest hour things can only get brighter and just think how miraculous the light will be!

WOW

well I had my first encounter with racism this week y'all and wouldn't you know it was from black folk. *sigh* this was the shocker to me, the roles were totally reversed and I saw and heard first hand the things that in my mind make them soooo racist. Its crazy I was sooo prepared for it to possibly be from the other end of the spectrum and some point in time maybe. But man oh man having it be the reverse really caught me off guard. I know i'm being so vague and maybe not even making any sense to those reading this but I just had to vent in some way.

First Day down 9 hundred and somemore to go LOL

Well I got through my first day of Doctoral School today. It was cool I was so Anxious last night and even this morning. But most of the people there were very friendly and welcoming. It was a little disheartening however that out of a class of 80 there were only 5 African Americans. *sigh* Thankfully I have had a very diverse child and early adulthood so this isn't really that strange to me but I mean 5?!? I guess that just means I have to be on my game 75 times as much. In a way I feel like I have to prove myself as if just being there isn't testament enough to that fact that I am just as capable and competent as anyone there. Ah but such is the life of a young black women on a professional path in a big not black world. Please don't get me wrong this is not to offend anyone or to place blame or play the race card, nor am I prejudging because no one has treated me differently or unfairly in my one day of attendance LOL and the administrators have been wonderful since I've been dealing with them, but that still doesn't change that fact that in the entire school of a few thousand I have been told, the Black community does not surpass 30 people. I feel like I have to represent, like all eyes and assumptions are on me and based on those that came before me whether they succeeded, exceeded expectations or just got by.

Question to those who are in the workplace or school and are really the minority of the place do you feel that you have to work twice as hard to prove yourself or do you just do you no matter where that places you?

In the picture above is one of my classmates who I met prior to school starting. She is a lovely young lady and we have become good acquaintances and hopefully with time great study partners and friends.

just a bit

Hey couldn't sleep so I figured I'd update my blog.

My hair is in a weird state these days the back is really sealing well almost all of it. I can clearly see it still has a long way to go but its well on its way most of them really aren't loose at all. The front however has condensed and has more of a fro appearance which makes wearing it out a little difficult. As I often say I don't really care for big hair and that is the appearance I get right now. It looks like its trying to start to seal but its just mostly unravelled. ( not slipping though)

I will be 7 months in a couple of days. I didn't really take any pics of my hair out lately but I'll try to get some in a couple of days.